Here I am, sitting in masters class. It’s 7:50pm on a Wednesday night, I’ve already taught all day long, I’ve had approximately three large cups of coffee. I’m tired, I’m frazzled, I look like…well, ask my students: “Ms. P, you look really, um, tired?” I do. Over the course of nine days, I complete one graduate level course. It’s intense, it’s cool, it’s frustrating, it’s like, hard. So why do this? Why should I keep going to school when I don’t have to? I graduated from university with honors, I’m a certified educator, and I’m an okay (not in any way great, but boy you could be worse) teacher.

But I can’t stop. I love learning stuff! It’s so cool! I’m serious: when you are learning about stuff that you care about, stuff that’s cool, stuff that’s interesting, it ROCKS. IT ROCKS YOUR SOCKS OFF (Fact: I do not have any socks on right now – take that!).

And yes, I have boring days, or frustrating lectures, or pointless work, but the bottom line, my friends, is this: I am taking part in continued discourse on the nature of learning, I am questioning and reflecting on my teaching philosophy and pedagogy, and – this is my student’s favorite part – I have become a much more sympathetic fellow learner. Oh, you’re stressed and tired and you have too much to do and you forgot something important? Me too! You are constantly questioning your mind and your perspective and **hopefully** growing intellectually? ME TOO! This is so cool!

LIFELONG LEARNING IS COOL. Here’s the rub, though: I love learning this stuff because education is my passion, my bag, my cat’s meow, my version of the bees knees, right? But every day my students take courses that they don’t love, that they don’t have passion for…in fact, there are students sitting in my class every day that Don’t Like English. I KNOW – you’re SHOCKED! I AM TOO! I don’t understand how someone couldn’t L-O-V-E my class, because it is infinitely fascinating. Fact. So what do we do?

How do we make things interesting that we don’t find interesting? Well, from my perspective, I go for inspiration. I go for enthusiasm. But what if your teacher doesn’t dig that style? What if you don’t dig my style? I say own it. Own that subject. Make it your own. Find a way to enter into a subject and enjoy it. Maybe even (desperate measure here) love that subject because you can; there are individuals all over this globe that don’t get to learn, that don’t get to do what we take for granted. Man, it’s cliche, but DUDE, it’s true: we are so lucky, I am so lucky, you are so lucky, so FEEL LUCKY. Sit in Algebra (my most hated class since I failed it in the 8th grade and Mr. At***** told me I was an idiot and would never understand math) and FEEL LUCKY. Soak it in. Embrace it. Marinate in it. Roll around and savor it.

I am. Right now. At 8:20 on a Wednesday night.

photo: laos chalkboard / s.patterson / 12.08

This is what I like to call an “Excellent Question” – why should we do this? What does it matter? Does it matter?

Since I have again embarked on the journey of blogging with my students, I have been barraged with the inevitable queries as to why we have to do this (usually spoken in a planitive and/or whiney voice) by my students and colleagues (not in the whiney voice though, of course).

My answer? Because I believe in it. I believe that there is a world out there that goes deeper than Facebook superpokes and MSN instant messages. I believe that my students are a the edge of a precipice and they have two choices: leap into the unknown which is rife with fear and possibility and the potential for greatness or meekly tiptoe back into the blank safety of normalcy and mediocrity. I believe that these incredible fifteen and sixteen year olds are finding out who they are and what they believe in and they need a creative intellectual outlet for that process. I believe that what they have to say outside of class is just as valuable – if not more so – because it allows me to learn about Who They Are.

“Write about music! Write about TV! Write about identity! Write about socialization! Write about food! Just write!” I have heralded in class, trying to transmit my deep enthusiasm and excitement over this endeavor. I’ve made the party analogy: when you go to a party, who do you talk to? Do you talk to the interesting person with varied interests and a passion for life, art, architecture, theatre, politics, something, anything, or do you want to talk to the person with nothing of interest to say? One student response was, “But I don’t have ANYTHING interesting to say!?” And my response was this: “YES YOU DO! YOU ARE INTERESTING! YOU HAVE THINGS OF VALUE TO SAY! YOU DESERVE TO FIND A COMMUNITY OF PEOPLE WHO ALSO BELIEVE IN YOU! YOU CAN DO THIS!”**

So. I’m excited to see what happens. Last year blogging was hands down the best way to get a better sense of who my students are and what they need…I don’t want them to focus on grammar or a certain number of words (though posting with regularity is key to establish the regular habit of self-expression and developing your online voice), I want them to focus on meaning, on ideas, on passion, on excitement…on anything that inspires them. Because that, my friends, will inspire me.

**Caps added for emphasis but not necessarily to indicate yelling.

photo: laos village child / s. patterson / 12.08